urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:ajmcc91 ajmcc91 ajmcc91 2009-05-13T15:48:08Z urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:ajmcc91:2537 2009-05-13T15:48:08Z 2009-05-13T15:48:08Z now its all a matter of pressure. <br />i look in the mirror and now I know Im thin. Atleast I am compared to the average american. <br />Now its pressure. <br />Last 5 pounds. <br />I just wanna see what I will look like. What i look like when i hit the two&nbsp;digit weight. its all curiosity. <br /><br />Ive always been an extremeist of sorts. And this is just another obsession ive allowed myself to fall victim to. urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:ajmcc91:2159 2009-04-30T16:54:15Z 2009-04-30T16:54:15Z okay a lot has changed. <br />i am recovering from i guess you could say anorexia. I lost a lot of weight. and gained a little back. which&nbsp;i am fine with. now Im focused on getting toned. I dont wanna gain all the weight back. im 110 now. but I wanna eat healthy and live healthy and feel healthy. <br />im considering going on the raw food diet. maybe the vegan diet. I dont mean to say diet as in my goal is to lose weight, but just that veganism or raw foods will be my 'diet'. if that makes since. <br /><br />i wanna see how much will power I have. how much i can withstand. i like to see how far I can go. <br />unfortunatley I already ate, eggs and bread for breakfast. <br />unraw and un vegan. i know I could handle a vegetarian diet. <br />for i dont really eat meat. <br />i eat only whole foods. unprocessed. <br /><br />Im trying to find support in groups thatll help me succeed to and keep me motivated to eat and be healthy. opposed to starving myself and losing more weight. <br /><br />i wanna maintain my weight. is this even possible!?